Saturday, June 3, 2017


So, I don't know whether I'm done blogging or not - I seem to come back to it every once in a while. And yet I have failed mightily this year.

I have been on sabbatical! It rocked. And was way less productive than hoped. But! I got certifications and permits re-upped, I wrote some stuff, I got some data, I fixed a lot of software/equipment crap, I cleaned my lab. I finally have a "recommended for funding" from NSF, so hey, even with nothing else accomplished, that is a win. I need to work slightly harder this summer to make up for some slackage, but it was overall very good for me and my sanity at the very least.

I have maintained my goal of getting back into a workout routine - every day that the kid has been in daycare and I haven't had to spend the entire day in something like a training workshop or a car-buying trip, I have exercised. And I am feeling a lot better as a result, with the hope that I can continue to prioritize this thing that has been missing since I had a baby. Also I have slept a lot more, and that helps a lot. I don't think I quite realized how much having a kid totally destroyed me. Until now.

Also, the kid is 3.5. If we all survive this age, I hope there are better things to come, because man, 3.5 is not a joke. 3.5 is keeping my alcohol consumption at levels higher than I would like. 3.5 is rough. And it doesn't help that the kid has been sick off and on recently, making all of us more miserable. She sleeps, at least. In ways that involve kicking me or randomly screaming, but sleep.

And now, family vacation week, because what says "you didn't really get as much work done as you should have this term but now it is summer" better than spending the entire week with a 3.5 year old who throws tantrums because of things like not going through a door first or wanting you not to have moved objects last night?*

*3.5 can be pretty cute, especially when "we are best friends".  Also of course I love my kid, but she has her moments.

Sunday, January 1, 2017



The fall was rough.  There was the election, which was its own thing.  But I was also doing extra teaching, stressing extra hard, sleeping as poorly as ever.  I made it through, but it was not the best few months. 

Since the term ended I've been either dealing with the kiddo (sick for a full week early in the month, then recently at home for break) or grant-writing.  And now that I'm almost done with both of those things I want another break just so I can get some down time.  Partner and I did get to a few movies and had a dinner out, so I can't complain too much, but I certainly don't feel either rested or prepared for January.

2016 was not as bad for us as it has been for many, but I can't say it was particularly good either. We're keepin' on: Partner is finishing up some school soon and moving on to a grad program if he has his way; our cat now has a permanent health issue in her old age that requires some maintenance and planning of travel on our part; and the baby isn't a baby any more, especially now that she's been pottying successfully for several weeks (and also 3 very soon!). 

2017 is going to be the me-year, if I get my act together.  I need to wean the kiddo, because our nursing relationship has become more antagonistic than beneficial.  I need to spend the time on myself to exercise regularly, because that has always been my sanity and my body-maintenance (and this was the year I finally got fed up with letting that slide).  I need to get some work done, finish some projects.  I have a sabbatical coming so that should be doable.  I also have a decent teaching schedule this winter, so no good excuses for staying up too late to work.  The kid is starting to finally sleep some of her nights all the way through, and I should be able to spend less of my free time catching up on naps for myself.  It's time to shift my schedule, enforce some boundaries.  I hope I can make it happen.

I would like to feel more connected to things I can do in the wider world, how to fight the general sense of foreboding for the planet and the country, but I somehow am still feeling too tied-down, too inward-looking.  I think that will change as we move into 2017, but I'm still searching for how I want to fight what I think is probably coming.  We'll see how that evolves.

Happy 2017!  I hope it has more to offer us than we anticipate.